Being Considerate

(article to appear in the next issue of the DALnet zine)

Title: Being Considerate
Author: Aaron Schultz (aaron@powertrip.net)

Recently I've noticed a growing problem both online and in RL. People are
forgetting how to be considerate to those around them. This ranges from a
complete lack of patience for simple items to people doing things that
they normally wouldn't do. On IRC it comes across even more because,
after all, "IT IS ONLY IRC!!".. which although yes, like many of you, IRC
is a part of my "real life" it still can be turned off and walked away
from.. yet people find issues on it which seem to require "real life"
retaliation.

A "real life" example of this lack of consideration was recently found at
a local shopping center where they have a movie theater playing the
recently released NEMO movie for kids. Ideally, parents would be
level-headed when taking their kids to this, planning ahead, they would
know that parking would be bad since it is opening weekend and such...
instead, I found people almost fighting it out with fists in the parking
lot, minivans full of toddlers with parents cussing and honking and waving
fists at other cars that just stole their parking place, people taking the
mustard container form a local restaurant across the parking lot (and
leaving it there) because it was "too crowded to eat near the theater" and
many other similar examples.

Online, everyone seems to think they have a "right" to have something that
either isn't theirs or was taken away for abuse. Yes, part of this comes
from being an oper as I do get those people who like to come to me and
request things they have no business requesting, or they have broken the
rules and don't realize that there is punishment. I somehow think that
these same people would be asking the guard in jail "hey, I didn't really
do anything wrong.. I realize you have a video of it, but it wasn't me.. I
mean it wasn't that bad and I won't do it again." ..and when someone is
denied what they were asking for, they decide that retaliation is the
answer.. everything from flooding a user or channel to posting their
target's phone number and info on public areas to flat-out calling
people's homes and making death threats.

It's a growing problem and getting WAY out of hand. Parents, it starts
with you being able to control YOUR tempers and realizing for yourselves
that YOU need to have patience and control or your children will NEVER
have it. Kids - look around you, decide what really IS and IS NOT
important and react accordingly. If someone isn't taking away your
shelter, your food or your family, then you need to sit back and consider
dealing with things in a more responsible manor. And no, apologies are
not a sign of weakness, so use them - they just indicate that you're
smarter than the other guy who hasn't realized they've made a mistake yet.

Posted by Aaron at June 01, 2003 11:45 AM